In September 2016, a self-help book came out with the word ‘Fuck’ in the title.
It went on to sell over sixteen million copies (and counting).
You’ve probably heard of ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck’ written by Blogger and Author Mark Manson. Its bright orange cover stood out as much as the title on bookshelves when it was released. Manson and his mantra to provide ‘Life Advice That Doesn’t Suck’ changed the self-help world forever.
Traditionalists held up their arthritic fists in rage at the blasphemous title – the younger audience embraced his new approach to life’s problems. An approach to embracing life’s problems instead of wallowing in false positivity.
I’ve nerded over Manson for years. He writes about his flaws, his unique perspectives and his ultimate desire to live a life with purpose. This approach resonated with me.
In a way, he inspired me to start writing myself. He certainly inspired me to travel as his nuanced look at the world got me off my ass and out there again.
I’ve bookmarked many of his favourite blogs over the years.
Here are ten quotes from his blog posts that inspired me the most to get out into the world (and why).
‘Travel is not about finding yourself, it is about creating yourself’
The idea you can ‘find yourself’ when you travel is just fabricated bs – probably stolen from some movie line or book somewhere.
When you return from a memorable travel experience, you do feel different though. It doesn’t have to be a year-long sabbatical – it can just be a week. There are no rules.
What happens is by exposing yourself to a different way of life for a while and breaking your normal routine, you get a little closer to understanding who you are as a person.
Whether you like that person or not is up to you.
I have been guilty of trying to ‘find myself’ in the past. That is why I have disappeared on different adventures over the years.
I never found myself. I just started doing new things – a lot of them. Writing a book, journaling, exploring my curiosities and meeting new people. Stuff I never did at home. That was the point. I learned all of these while travelling.
You have an opportunity to do the same.
By having new experiences, you find your limits and end up creating the truest version of you.
‘Travel is not just about taking a break from your routine - it’s about breaking free from your routine altogether’
This is a spicy one.
I’ve got to credit Medium writing guru Tim Denning for this.
‘If you are an employee, you are a slave.’ A slave relies on their master. I’m not ashamed to admit as I write this, I’m a slave. But most of us are.
In saying that, I’m doing everything I can to break those chains in this online writing world (so please share this post with all your friends).
The reality is for most of us, we need to ask someone for time off work to travel. We need to ask to take our children out of school. We live in a world where our normal routine relies more on the consent of other people than our own decisions.
We have been conditioned to accept this is normal. It’s not (and shouldn’t be). Experiencing different cultures will prove this to you. There are different ways of living.
Travel is an opportunity to live your life on your terms. Do what you want to do. Away from the shackles of your boss. Away from an environment that relies on routine to function correctly.
By breaking free from your routine for a while, you might be surprised at what you find.
‘Travel can be uncomfortable, frustrating, or even dangerous at times. But its also exhilarating, eye-opening and life-changing'
It is so easy to glamourise travel.
Look at Instagram and Tiktok. Gorgeous selfies on a clifftop, tanned bodies on a European beach – don’t get me started on photos of people standing in the middle of the road for a photo.
What you don’t see are the queues, hundreds if not thousands of people all squeezed into a small town square, pissing off all the locals, but all wanting the ‘unique’ travel experience promised in their social media feeds.
The frustration I experienced in Venice with thousands and thousands of tourists day-tripping to the canal city in Northern Italy was a stressful day.
Or the time I was in Nepal climbing the Cho-La Pass glacier with no crampons on. I was only a slip away from, well, let’s say you probably wouldn’t be reading this article.
The point Manson makes here is travel isn’t always fun, it is frustrating and it can be dangerous – even boring. Despite what you see and hear. But it is memorable.
Studies have shown that even though humans tend to remember negative and traumatic things more, we tend to put a positive spin on situations.
That is why my memories of Venice are good ones. My time on the glacier, I smile at it now (sorry Mum).
Travel allows you to put yourself in uncomfortable situations – whether you like it or not.
The beauty is that is where the best travel stories and memories are found.
‘Travelling teaches you to be more mindful, to live in the present moment and to appreciate the beauty of the world around you’
When you travel, you become a kid again.
Your curiosity levels are heightened. Every sound you notice, every taste becomes unique. You just want more and more until you pass out in your hotel or apartment.
Just like a child does at home.
Living in the present, without thinking about work deadlines the following week, can be exhausting.
Travelling teaches you more than how to barter or learn some dodgy Spanish (I’m still terrible at those btw). It teaches you something more important.
It teaches you that you could be wrong about pretty much EVERYTHING.
Your perception of what is truth becomes distorted when you travel. Your values and opinions will be challenged. If you allow yourself, you will notice different ways of life, people who live by different values. It is humbling. It makes you think.
Our zombie brains could all do with a little more of this.
‘Travelling is not about being a tourist. It’s about being an explorer, a learner and a student of life’
I won’t even enter the Tourist vs Traveler debate that has been around for years.
That discussion has been nothing more than a pointless, dick-swinging competition where no one is a winner. We are all the same. If you visit a foreign country, do you think the locals are debating what status of visitor you are?
Yeah, I thought so.
What Manson is getting at here are the different types of travellers among us.
If you want to go and sit on an all-inclusive resort in the Caribbean for two weeks while you are brought Pina Coladas by clicking your fingers, good on you. If you want to stick to group tours to get the best bang for your buck, that’s cool too.
You also have your independent travellers. Your self-sufficient adventurer types. They just go about having random adventures wherever the day takes them.
Many travellers are a mixture of the two.
Manson is teaching us here that despite our preference for travel, we all have a unique opportunity to experience a different way of life when we do. It could be just trying to understand a menu at a local restaurant in Asia or bartering for a taxi in Colombia when you are jetlagged.
Travel is the perfect opportunity to learn about the world and its unique customs.
Don’t worry, you can go back to your resort or hotel in the evening, get your Netflix fix and post your Insta pics before passing out.
Just don’t pass up the opportunity to learn a little about the world while it is on your doorstep.
‘Travelling is not just about the destinations you visit, it’s about the journey and lessons you learn along the way’
My first time in Bali I got ripped off big time.
I don’t blame them though. I stuffed up. They just got the better end of the deal. When it was too late and I questioned my mistake, the friendly demeanour of the shopowners was gone and I cut a track swiftly.
The lesson I learned was to pay attention. I didn’t make the same mistake again. This type of lesson is something you can’t plan or prepare for from the comfort of your couch at home.
Planning your travels and writing your bucket lists is super fun. It’s one of my favourite parts of travel. It allows you to start enjoying the adventure before you begin.
When you start travelling, you quickly realise that your bucket list rarely lives up to expectations.
Sure, the selfie in front of the Eiffel Tower is one you may reminisce about fondly, but you are more likely to remember the long lunch in a Parisian cafe you spent later that afternoon with a friend or loved one, watching the world go by.
You begin to understand that the destination is nothing more than a navigational tool. What you remember most is the journey along the way.
Next time you travel, visit those places you have always wanted to.
Just remember to enjoy how you got there.
‘Travelling forces you to adapt, be flexible and to go with the flow. These are skills important to have in life, both on and off the road’
‘Your flight is cancelled’. Oh crap.
Heard that one before? Next, you are In a rush to join a mile-long queue with other panicking passengers to speak to a service agent, the kids are crying and the food places are closed.
You have two options. One is in your control. The other very much isn’t. Sure, yelling at a service agent (who has already been sworn at by every passenger before you) might make you feel better, but she can’t fly the plane.
It’s chaos.
The other option is to see what else you can arrange. Come up with an alternative plan.
Things will go wrong when you travel. It’s the nature of the beast. I’ve lost luggage. Missed flight connections. Even had my passport stolen from a hotel safe (work that one out).
Adopting a flexible mindset and being open to change is the key to an enjoyable and fulfilling travel experience. There is always a solution. You just need to find it.
A ‘poor me’ attitude will not only make you a miserable person to be around, but it won’t allow you to be open to potential new experiences.
You can bring this home with you.
In your day-to-day life of work and career, the unexpected happens all the time. By bringing home, the same flexible attitude you have to travel, you just might have another valuable tool to navigate through life at home.
Travel teaches you some unexpected skills.
‘Travel is not about escaping your problems, it's about gaining perspective on them and finding solutions’
I went to the extreme by selling my house to travel the world.
On reflection, the house stood for everything related to my unhappy life at the time. When I sold the house and began travelling, I quickly realised I was still the same person, with the same crap going on between my ears. My problems came with me.
I was the problem.
It was my ‘Oh crap’ moment. An odd thing then happened.
As we travelled through South-East Asia, onto Europe, the noise in my head started to fade. I began to embrace the present more. I started turning into a person I could look at in the mirror.
Your routine and day-to-day lifestyle are the biggest contributors to your stress and problems.
By removing yourself from this lifestyle, you give yourself a break. You begin to look at your problems a little differently. You zoom out a bit – you gain a new perspective. Often one completely at odds with what you thought before.
That might be all you need to find a solution.
Starting my writing habit became the solution to my problems at the time. It continues to be now.
Don’t be fooled into thinking you can jump on a plane and be healed. It won’t. It takes time but travel can often be the magic potion to help you find a solution for them.
All are good valid points. Travel definitely helped me in some of these ways.
Thanks Nick, appreciate the feedback! Keep it up mate, you have some great content on your site. Cheers!
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All of these points resonated in one or more ways….brought to mind several stories I retell frequently about my travels and the reasons for them. I’m learning to go with the flow more and not build expectations too much – about to spend two months in Italy (& yes I’ve got to the point where I work but don’t have to ask permission – best decision I ever made).
Great Fiona, thanks for reading.
It was an article that got me thinking a lot. Same as you, I can think of so many stories of my own travels. Italy sounds fantastic – my roots go back there so need to spend more time there. I’m working on the asking for ‘permission’ thing right now 🙂
Safe travels
Marc
Great article. Made the lifestyle change myself a few years ago. Agree with a lot of these points. Living in different countries is one of the best ways to open your mind and learn.
Almost slipped into a few glaciers myself, once in the Himalayas and once near the top of Kilimanjaro !
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